Yesterday I spent a lot of time thinking about my dad and kind of checking in, wondering what he’d think of my life and my choices over the last ten years. I thought about parenting and about the lessons and wisdom I got from him, and how I want to pass those on to my own daughters.

I thought about how life is short for so many. I thought about my new year’s resolution to simplify. My motivation behind that resolution is really the desire to have more time to spend doing the things I authentically love doing, and to have more time to spend with the people who really, really float my boat.

A couple of years ago, my BFF Shara told me I am a “collector of friends.” I don’t want to be a collector of friends. I want to have a close circle and give them my best. When I get that feeling of, “Ugh, no. Not this again. I don’t want to do/wear/eat/watch/listen/give my time to this,” I am trying to stop and ask myself how I can kindly show whatever that thing is… the door. Oprah would probably call this me trying to live my best life.

I thought of the journals I keep that are really letters to each of my girls, and how there’s a quote in each one from one of my favorite movies, “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.” Brad Pitt’s character writes to his daughter,

“I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you find that you’re not, I hope you find the strength to start all over again.”

And then, late at night in shower, where things often hit me like lightning bolts, I had a thought that made me feel lighter. I had spent the entire afternoon and evening – a good chunk of six hours – avoiding grading by cooking and baking. I made yogurt, a cassoulet, homemade instant oatmeal, granola, and peanut butter cookies with Dove chocolate hearts in the middle {You pretty much want to come over and help me eat all of this now, right?}. And I loved every minute. I will love this morning when everyone comes downstairs and marvels and enjoys.

The thing about the last couple years, baking for other people? Well, I never got to see them enjoy it. Last night {in the shower}, it occurred to me that that is what I love. I enjoy the baking, but it’s for the end result. When I deliver a box, that last, all-important step goes missing.

And so today you will see that the old tab on the blog with the Fresh Scratch menu has flown away. Because that’s how I make decisions – I am very snappy that way. No more filling orders. That’s the great thing about life, you can change direction. You can choose to visit another shore. Because you are the captain.

And I know just where I am headed. So be ready to see some changes to the blog {mostly small to you, big to me} over the next year or so. I’m making more time for the things that bring me joy. Something else will be for sale, but not yet.

Because, as my dad often said, “Work’s not really work unless you’d rather be doing something else.”

Ponder that one today. I hope you’ll be glad you did.